A little while back I went on what can only be described in retrospect as an epic rant of comedic proportions. In the interest of restoring the karmic balance, I feel it only right to gush over a few really cool things that I just dig.
Ritz-Carlton Service
There’s something to be said for outstanding service, and The Ritz-Carlton is legendary for their level of catering to a guests every whim, many times before they even know they want something. Here’s just a few personal examples:
On our first anniversary I took Megan to The Ritz-Carlton in Boston, the very first Ritz-Carlton in the US. At the time I was employed with the company, so I got the room for $50 a night which is obscenely cheap (the room we stayed in went for $550 a night normally). Although it was a magical trip, there are two things about the hotel that stand out in my memory.
One of the highlights of staying at the Ritz-Carlton Boston is the antique elevators and the friendly elevator operators. When I say antique, I mean the kind with two sliding brass gates (one on the elevator car itself, and the other just opposite on each floor) and a rotary handle that moves the car up and down depending on which direction it’s rotated. Now, I don’t know if it’s a job requirement for the position of elevator operator, but each of the three elevator operators (there are only three elevators, and I only ever saw the same three operators, one for each car, regardless of the hour) were african-american with french accents. Now I’d been to the Boston hotel a few months earlier for work, and had gotten to know one of the operators, Coco, as I always just happened to be in his elevator. After checking in and getting our room assigned, Megan and I happened to step into Coco’s elevator. “Good afternoon, Mr. Looney. How have you been? It’s been some time wince we’ve seen you here. And who is this lovely woman you are with?” The questions came rapidly, but in a warm and friendly manner, like lost friends reunited.
When we got to the room, Megan asked me to go get a bucket of ice. I looked all over the little map in the binder, but couldn’t find an ice machine on it, so I called the front desk to ask them where it was located. “I’ll have some sent up right away!” replied the friendly woman on the other end of the line. When I thanked her, she replied, very warmly and sincerely, with the Ritz-Carlton standard acknowledgement “it’s my pleasure”, and she meant it.
Within 2 minutes there was a knock on our door. I figured it was the ice, but was completely taken off guard and pleasantly surprised by what showed up. A gentleman in a tuxedo and white gloves with a white towel over one arm stood at the doorway with a cart. On the cart, which was covered by a pristine white linen tablecloth, was a massive and intricately detailed and decorated silver bowl filled to the brim with ice, a large silver ladle that matched the bowl lay alongside it, and on the other side of the bowl was a bud vase with a single red rosebud. Evidently used to my reaction of open-mouthed stunned silence, the gentleman quickly wheeled the cart inside. As soon as he had crossed the threshold back into the hall, he pivoted smartly on one heel, held the arm with the towel at a perfect 90 degree angle, with the other relaxed at his side, bowed slightly, and asked if there was anything else I may be in need of. When I managed to stammer that we didn’t need anything else, he made another small bow and disappeared down the hall. Megan and I just stared at each other and the massive silver bowl of ice in the middle of our room and burst into a fit of giggling. And that was only the beginning of the trip.
On another trip, this time a business orientation at the Naples, Florida resort (rated the #2 hotel in the world by Conde Nast), I was again overwhelmed and more than pleasantly surprised by the level of service I received. Now seeing as how we were travelling in late August, stepping outside the carefully climate-controlled environment of the airport in Florida was like having a hot wet blanket thrown over your head. It was hard to breath, my clothes were sticking to me, I had just gotten off a 4 hour flight from SLC, and sweat was running off my head and down my back. I was NOT happy. The hotel is about an hour and a half from the airport, so we still had more travel time before I could strip down and cool off. At least the shuttle van was air conditioned, and did a pretty good job of keeping us cool. When we arrived at the hotel (which was gorgeous), I made an off-hand remark about how damn hot and muggy it was as I was stepping out of the cool van and onto the driveway. I grabbed my luggage from the back of the van and headed inside to more air conditioning. No sooner had I set foot inside the door than a man in a white short sleeve shirt pressed with a razor-sharp crease, white shorts, and knee-high white socks stepped forward with a silver platter (no shit, it really was a silver-effing-platter) with a bottle of ice water that was already starting to sweat and a cool damp towel. “for you, sir. Perhaps it will ease the unbearable heat and make you more comfortable.” He said as I took both the towel and the water from him. Now, lest you think this was routine, I am the only one of our group of 20 that received this treatment.
I made a comment. They heard me, and did something about it before I even knew what I wanted.
That, my friends, is service.
Food Network
I LOVE the Food Network. It makes me hungry. Every time. It doesn’t even matter what show is on or what they’re cooking, it makes me hungry. And it makes me want to cook, which Megan loves. It’s pretty much a win/win. And you know, who woulda thunk, way back in 1993 that a television network devoted entirely to food would actually be a viable business model? And there’s TONS of stuff to dig about Food Network. A few of my favorites are the fact that I get to learn about food and how it’s prepared, I get to find new establishments to add to my Culinary Tour of America list, and many of the shows are just plain entertaining.
One of my current favorites is “What Would Brian Boitano Make?”, and yes, the theme song is exactly what you expect it to be. And who knew Brian Boitano was funny?
Guy Fieri is another favorite, especially his “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives” show. He’s even been to Utah a few times, visiting some of may favorite places (Red Iguana, Moochie’s), reminding me to visit otehrs I enjoy (Burger Bar, Lone Star Taqueria) and giving me ideas for new places to go (Blue Plate Diner). And he’s just plain fun to watch.
One of the best things about Food Network is that if you see something that looks tasty, you can jump on their website and usually find a recipe.
Ridiculously fast Internet
A few years back, as some of you may recall, there was a big hubbub about some proposal to use tax dollars to fund a community open-source high-speed internet infrastructure across the Wasatch Front. Some towns opted in, others decided it wasn’t a good idea. I’m glad that my city leaders didn’t have their heads in the sand and had the foresight to see how cool this could be. Murray city opted in to the Utopia Network, and as a result, I have ridiculously fast internet.
How fast?
Well, here’s a little analogy to demonstrate: Imagine that dial-up speed is like watching a dripping faucet, and typical DSL speeds are like a drinking fountain. What’s considered “High-Speed Internet” by most cable companies, like Comcast, is like a garden hose, and my Internet is pretty much like opening a fire hydrant full-bore. I can download a 100-minute movie in full HD in just minutes.
In fact, when Megan started her new job a few months back, she came home after the first couple days and told me there was something wrong with her computer. I asked her what the problem was, and she told me that the Internet was running super slow. Once we determined that it ran super slow only at the office, she gained a new appreciation for just how fast our Internet is. For you geeks out there who can appreciate this, I have a fiber-optic cable coming directly into my house.
My Internet pretty much rocks, and it’s faster than about 60% of the developed countries in the world have AT THEIR ABSOLUTE FASTEST SPEED.
The best part? I pay $50 a month for it.
So that’s my list for now, hopefully the balance of karma has been restored so I can be free to rant and bitch again. I was starting to miss it, and I’m sure you were, too.
